What I wish someone told me before moving

I typically get itchy feet every couple of years and move to another country. That’s how I ended up living in Canada, Dubai and the UK for 2 years each. Don’t get me wrong I still get severe butterflies in my stomach in the pre-flight phase, which is valid because moving is a huge deal, but I feel like I have the general process pretty down. I will go into the process of moving abroad in another blog post but here are just a few things I wish people had told me that would have settled some of my anxiety before the big move/s. 

Expect it to be a bit of a mess

Regardless of how much you pre plan it won’t ever be 100% smooth. Some of the problems that I have had to muddle my way through are: 

• My bank cancelling my card thinking it was fraud 🥹

• My luggage not changing flights with me

• Being lost and not speaking the language 

• My ID not being accepted when applying for a bank card

• Getting COVID on the plane 💀 

  
  

You can still experience a level of culture shock

I thought when I moved to Canada and the UK I'd be breezing because English is a first language and the food is recognisable. But, instead I experienced culture shock just not in the way of a language barrier. 

I felt out of my depth and disoriented which created a general pit of anxiety. Once I had a house, a job and started to make friends I began to enjoy the experience but I want to be honest, it wasn’t immediate. See my tips for handling culture shock here.

Some of the things that were difficult to manage were

• Working out the London tube, it’s really simple once you have used it a few times but it is kind of a rite of passage to get on a tube going the wrong way at least once  

• Missing foods (super simple things like a caramello koala or tim tams) that weren’t available (or $30 for a pack of 10)

• The cold. I knew it was going to be cold but holy shittt, this warm blooded Aussie was unprepared. If you are moving somewhere that gets a true winter l-a-y-e-r-s are a godsend

• People appearing unapproachable, it’s rare to smile at someone in London and get a smile back so don’t take it to heart 😂 

  
  

You will lose friends from back home

*but you might get them back in the future

I truly believed that my friendships were unbreakable and solid but distance is tough. And it’s literally no fault of either person. You will meet new people and starting hanging out with them in your new country and the person back home will do the same. I felt like a failure when the time frame between talking to friends was daily, then weekly, then 6 monthly. But it just happens - there’s only so many times you can tell someone your day was really busy before the conversation dies down. 

Don’t beat yourself up about it. I have reconnected with people 5 years on and we immediately jump back into it being like I never left. Just because the conversation starts to slow or dies off doesn’t mean that that person won’t end up back in your life in the future. Just enjoy the new memories that you are making abroad. 🙂

Your emotions are a bit whacko 

Moving abroad involves removing yourself from your support system, your comfort zone and the stability found at home. It only makes sense that when all of these changes happen at once your emotions take a while to regulate and self care and compassion is super crucial during this time. One second I was strolling around with a Cheshire cat grin being like ‘how is this my life’ the next I was crying on the bus being like ‘how is this my life’. It’s all swings and roundabouts and you just need to flow with it. But it does improve I promise. 

You think that you know the language but you actually don’t

*Yet. 

There is a huge difference between what you learn on Duolingo and how the language is used in real life. Duolingo or your language learning app of choice doesn’t account for different accents, common expressions and ‘slang’ used daily. Whilst having a grasp of the language is super helpful for when you first arrive for basic communication there will still be a learning curve whilst you get used to the language. It’s all part of the fun and people will (for the most part) be really supportive of you trying to use a second language. 

My advice is if you are looking to move to another country to try and make a friend that you can communicate in that language so you have a better grasp on a conversational level.