30 days ago I flew home - for an undetermined amount of time - to Australia and was able to surprise my Mum for her birthday, her shock was super adorable and made the secret keeping and the constant logistical conversations 100% worth it.
Reasons I came home: I don't really have to explain my choice for coming home but for context it was partially financial, partially the need to reset my health and my brain screaming for some semblance of stability. Living in two really expensive cities on minimum wage jobs was fun for a second but remaining in a fight or flight state for years on end wondering if you can make rent really zaps the zest for life.
The last month hasn't been all rainbows and butterflies, I forgot or maybe blocked out, how wild moving countries is. But here are some things that I have experienced. Let them serve as little reminders if you plan to move countries soon!
Jetlag is seriously ass-kicking.
I spent the first two weeks awake at 4am and dozing off intermitently until I gave up and just got up for the day. I'm such a good sleeper I thought I would be absolutely fine or get away with being jetlagged for only a few days. It's really draining to be soo tired for that long. My tips are sun exposure, if you can't sleep.. get up and try and find a consistent sleep routine ASAP.
My mood was on a MF seesaw.
If you know me in person, you will agree that I am generally not an emotional creature but coming back home had my tear ducts and overall mood in shambles. One second I was excited for the new opportunities Australia was offering me, full of hope and dreams, the next I was wishing I'd stayed abroad because it was all too hard. The mood stabilises with you finding your groove and settling, give it time.
I drastically underestimated how much needed to be done.
I envisaged lazy beach days and movie marathons doing one or two important things a day amidst taking a proper 'rest' HA, sis no. That was not the case. With a looming deadline of my new corporate job the to-do list along with the nauseating stress continued to grow at a pretty rapid pace. Yes, it's overwhelming to see your list contain 23 'must do now' things like finding affordable accommodation, renewing expired licenses, paying off student debt, buying a new wardrobe and moving cities but ticking them off feels frickin bomb!
It feels really lonely.
This one was particularly upsetting for me, as a very much people person. When I moved countries I lost touch with people from home, this is normal and pretty much everyone knows about that being a possibility. What doesn't get discussed on travel platforms is the internal dread realising you are coming home basically back at square one when it comes to friends.
Whilst I moved overseas, most moved on, sans Chels. Absolutely no shade to anyone, I will always have love for the people that I consider friends but a brutal reality is that not all friendships are salvageable after time away. At the same time, my friendships abroad feel rocky as the dynamic has changed. I no longer get to plan weekly catchups or call them on the train home because it's the middle of the night. It's a little like having your security blanket set alight. I don't have any advice for this yet because I'm still very much in the middle of it but I will circle back with tips in the future, check back.
Everyone has their own opinions.
I had someone ask me if that meant I was shutting down my travel page or my website now that I was home, I very nearly popped a blood vessel. First of all, I don't need to be constantly living out of a backpack to share my experience and help new solo travellers gain the confidence they need to start ticking off their bucketlist. Secondly, Australia is a huge place with an uncapped amount of opportunities to wander, so no.
Sharing ideas or plans with someone (or the internet) inherently opens you up to people 'sharing their, mostly uncalled for, opinion'. My advice is write pro/con lists at pubs with besties but ultimately take the information available to you and make your own decision, for you, before sharing your plan with anyone. If you make decisions for the benefit of others it will always feel inauthentic even if eventually it works out.
If you are about to move countries 1. I am really frickin proud of you. 2. be kind to yourself, you are doing a great job and you will start to feel better soon. 3. tackle one thing at a time, keep a big working list of everything that needs to be done but only focus your energy on one thing at a time.
If I can do anything to support you in your move, pleeeease reach out. I am only to happy to help, share nuggets of wisdom, bounce ideas or just let you vent.
Love, your friendly redhead.